3 Simple Chinese Jokes

三个简单中文笑话

Using humor effectively may be one of the most difficult things in a foreign language. To give you some help, here are three, short funny Chinese jokes that you can remember and use to charm your Chinese friends and colleagues. Learn Chinese joke goes a long way for developing relationships.

Joke 1

朋友一儿子，5岁，那天不好好学习，被朋友修理了，头上多了一个包。然后他儿子自言自语地说：“这世上有几种笨鸟，一种是先飞，一种是不飞，还有一种是下个蛋，把希望寄托在下一代。” 后来他儿子的头上又多了一个包。

Péngyǒu yī érzi,5 suì, nèitiān bù hǎo hào xuéxí, bèi péngyǒu xiūlǐle, tóu shàng duōle yīgè bāo. Ránhòu tā ér zǐ zì yán zì yǔ de shuō:“Zhè shìshàng yǒu jǐ zhǒng bèn niǎo, yī zhǒng shì xiān fēi, yī zhǒng shì bù fēi, hái yǒuyī zhǒng shì xià gè dàn, bǎ xīwàng jìtuō zài xià yīdài.” Hòulái tā érzi De tóu shàng yòu duōle yīgè bāo.

A 5 year old boy hadn’t been studying well and his father’s friend was helping him and giving him some discipline as well, his head had more than one lump on it. Then the boy said, This world has several types of stupid birds, one type tries to fly first, one type doesn’t fly, and one type puts its hopes in the next generation. Then another lump then appeared on the boy’s head.

Joke 2

有一对夫妻，他们出去吃饭，妻子突然大叫：「啊！我忘了关瓦斯，可能会发生火灾！」

丈夫却安慰她说：「没关系，反正我也忘了关洗手檯的水。」

妻子：「．．． ．．．」

Yǒu yīduì fūqī, tāmen chūqù chīfàn, qīzi tūrán dà jiào: "A! Wǒ wàng le guān wǎsī, kěnéng huì fāshēng huǒzāi!"

Zhàngfu què ānwèi tā shuō: "Méiguānxi, fǎnzhèng wǒ yě wàng le guān xǐ shǒu tái de shuǐ."

Qīzi: !!!???

There was a married couple who went out for dinner. Suddenly the wife exclaimed, "Oh! I forgot to turn off the gas! There could be a fire!"

The husband tried to comfort her by saying, "Don’t worry about it. In any case, I also forgot to turn off the water faucet."

Wife: !!!???

Joke 3

学生问老师：老师，为什么飞机在天上飞，却从不会撞到星星呢？

老师回答：因为星星会闪。

Xué shēng wèn lǎo shī : lǎo shī , wèi shén me fēi jī zài tiān shàng fēi ,què cóng bú huì zhuàng dào xīng xing nē ?

lǎo shī huí dá: yīn wèi xīng xing huì shǎn.

The student asks the teacher: Teacher, why the planes never run into the stars when flying in the sky?

The teacher answer: Beacuse the stars can dodge.

Explanation:

To understand this properly you need to pay attention to the word 闪 shǎn.

In Chinese, 闪 means a sudden flash of light.

However, in this case it uses a different meaning: 闪避 shǎn bì = 躲避 duǒ bì = to dodge quickly.

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